Thursday, October 21, 2010

Thursday's Things New Yorkers Say

It’s that time of the week again: Here’s a little tidbit for TTNYS:

Getting off the N Train in Astoria, two twenty-something guys talk:

“I can’t believe the one time I’m in New York, I don’t see the train,” Drunk #1 says. “Dude… we just got off the train,” replied Half Drunk #2. “What? No we didn’t,” Drunk #1 smiles sleepy and leans on Half Drunk #2… who is looking more like Slightly Buzzed and Really Confused. “Yes we did,” he says, almost worried. Drunk #1 wakes up slightly and looks around as the train pulls away. “Oh. I didn’t see it.” Half Drunk #2 looks at me, then looks at his friend, and shakes his head.

I feel like there should have been a camera, like there is in “The Office.” If there had been, he would have looked at that too (insert blank Jim-Halpert-look here).

Walking to Pace University classes on 5th Avenue and 45th Street:

“Excuse me miss, where do you get you’re hair done? I’ve got a great deal for you,” the walking salesman says. “Virginia,” I say, expecting him to leave me alone. “Virginia Salon?” he questions, following me. I stop and look at him like he’s a little dumb because I’m about to be a little late. “No. Richmond, Virginia. The state,” I reply. He contemplates the answer and shakes his head. “Oh. Well. We can’t compete with that.”

That’s right buddy. Back away slowly. Don’t mess with my Miss Yu Salon back in Richmond. I haven’t gone to another place since second grade!

Sitting at a Starbucks in Midtown, a middle-aged Asian man sits next to me. Some middle-aged New Yorker, with a slight northern accent, joins him.

“The LION has come OUT of his CAGE!!!” Wall Street #1 practically screams to Wall Street #2. He has just signed his divorce papers.

Warning: This week and next week are going to be crazy. Midterms, Broadway plays, apartment-warming parties, pancake breakfasts, work, and class all need to be squeezed into the next 5 days. Updates on the city when possible!


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2 comments:

Dilly Howard said...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! i cant stand the idea of trying to get through my days with out answers to your questions-what internship are you doing- most of all how will i live with out TTNYS!.
IM WARNING YOU NOW, IF I DONT GET SOME KIND OF UP DATE BRITNEY(insert middle name here)FITSGERALD I GOING TO MAKE A SPECIAL TRIP TO ONE OF THESE SO CALLED"PANCAKE BREAKFAST" AND MAKE YOU WRITE ON YOU BLOG.
YOU HEAR ME YOUNG LADY!!!!!!

good now that thats settled hope to hear from you soon
chow kiddo :).

britney fitzgerald said...

hahah i promise ill write! but the internship is going to be up in the air for a bit....hehe oh the suspense.